| 1 |
Why don’t the Jedi take off their shirts to greet each other?Because only a Sith deals in ab salutes. |
| 2 |
What do you get when you cross a Jedi and a snake?Force constrictor. |
| 3 |
Why did the Star Wars movies come out in the order 4 5 6 1 2 3?In charge of the sequence, Yoda was. |
| 4 |
Why do doctors make good Jedi?Because a Jedi must have patients (patience). |
| 5 |
What is it called when two suns are fighting?Star Wars. |
| 6 |
What is Jabba the Hutt’s middle name?The. |
| 7 |
What did Yoda say when he watched Star Wars on Blu-Ray?“HDMI!” |
| 8 |
What did Obi Wan Kenobi do when he needed money?He took out a bank clone. |
| 9 |
Why is Empire Strikes Back the best Star Wars movie?It’s a perfect 5/7. |
| 10 |
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a bounty hunter?Boba Frost. |
| 11 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Metaphors.(Metaphors who?)Metaphors be with you! |
| 12 |
My son Luke loves that we chose Star Wars characters as inspiration when naming my kids.However, his sister Chewbacca and his brother Boba Fett are less amused. |
| 13 |
Where did Luke Skywalker buy his new arm?At the second hand store. |
| 14 |
Who swore the most in Star Wars?R2-D2, they beeped out every word he said. |
| 15 |
How do Sith Lords say goodbye?“Darth-LATER!” |
| 16 |
Why was Kylo Ren always so pale?He never could catch any Reys! |
| 17 |
What’s the name of Darth Vader’s billionaire cousin?Tax E. Vader. |
| 18 |
What did Mike Tyson say to Harvey Dent while they watched Star Wars?“I find your lack of faith disturbing.” |
| 19 |
What does Princess Leia use to style her hair?A Hans Solo cup. |
| 20 |
Why didn’t Luke Skywalker like his steak?It was a little chewy. |
| 21 |
Why did the droid take a vacation?He needed to recharge his batteries. |
| 22 |
Who Did Princess Leia’s Hair?Darth Braider. |
| 23 |
Han Solo: “Yoda, are we going the right way?”Yoda: “Off course we are.” |
| 24 |
What do Gungans put things in?Jar Jars. |
| 25 |
Why was Yoda such a good gardener?He had a green thumb. |
| 26 |
Did you hear that Disney+ is making a crossover between Star Wars and Back to the Future where the time machine is half car and half person?It’s called the Man-DeLorean. |
| 27 |
Friend: “Do you know that one guy who just can’t have a conversation without quoting Star Wars?”Me: “Well, of course I know him, he is me!” |
| 28 |
What do you call two Han Solos singing together?Han Duet. |
| 29 |
Why did the stormtrooper buy an iPhone?Because he couldn’t find the Droid he was looking for! |
| 30 |
Which Star Wars movie is the best?Hans down, The Force Awakens is the best. |
| 31 |
Why was the droid angry?Because people kept pushing its buttons. |
| 32 |
What do you call a Canadian Sith?Pal-poutine. |
| 33 |
What does Leia say when she needs help?“I think I could use a Han here.” |
| 34 |
The Star Wars series is coming out with a female villain.She’ll be able to use the force to raise and lower things.Her name will be Ella Vader. |
| 35 |
Is BB hungry?No, BB-8. |
| 36 |
How did Mace die in Star Wars?Through the Windu. |
| 37 |
Did you hear about the girl who got a tattoo of her favorite Star Wars character on her face?You should’ve seen the Luke on her face. |
| 38 |
What is the scariest planet in Star Wars?Na-BOO! |
| 39 |
What’s Yoda’s advice for going to the bathroom?“Doo-doo or doo-doo-not-do.” |
| 40 |
Why can’t you smell Jedi in the new Star Wars movies?They will be Yoda-less. |
| 41 |
What’s the name of Obi-Wan’s twin brother?Obi-Also |
| 42 |
What’s a baseball player’s least favorite Star Wars movie?The Umpire Strikes Back. |
| 43 |
What did the Star Wars-obsessed Mexican couple name their son?Obi-Juan. |
| 44 |
Why did Anakin change his name to Skywalker?He couldn’t stand the old one Ani longer. |
| 45 |
What is the internal Temperature of a TaunTaun?Luke-Warm. |
| 46 |
If Ani is short for Anakin and Obi is short for Obi-Wan, then what is Luke short for?A stormtrooper. |
| 47 |
Did you know Chuck Norris was in every Star Wars movie?He played the force. |
| 48 |
What is the official pasta of Star Wars?Rotini! |
| 49 |
What do you call Kenobi triplets?Obi-Threes. |
| 50 |
Which Jedi became a rock star?Bon Jovi-Wan Kenobi. |
| 51 |
Know why the Jedi don’t have a navy?Because sailing is a path to the dockside. |
| 52 |
Who is short, green and plays the cello?Yo-Yo Da. |
| 53 |
Why does Kylo Ren’s lightsaber have so much crackle?Snap and Pop were busy. |
| 54 |
Who played Anakin Skywalker in the Star Wars prequels?Emperor Palpatine. |
| 55 |
What did everyone call Lando before he became a good pilot?Crashdo. |
| 56 |
What is a stormtrooper’s favorite store?The one next to target. |
| 57 |
What do you call a Star Wars themed all you can eat restaurant?Bo-buffet. |
| 58 |
What do you call a Sith who hates flying?Darth Grounded. |
| 59 |
How did Luke Skywalker know what Darth Vader got him for his Birthday?He felt his presents. |
| 60 |
What does a Jedi’s broken roof do?Leak Skywater. |
| 61 |
What did Darth Vader say when he walked into a vegetarian restaurant?“I find your lack of steak disturbing.” |
| 62 |
To celebrate Star Wars, we baked some “Wookie Cookies”.They were a little on the Chewy side. |
| 63 |
How does Darth Vader like his toast?On the dark side! |
| 64 |
How does Luke Skywalker get through the forest?Ewoks. |
| 65 |
What’s a Mandalorian’s favorite pasta?Fett-uccine. |
| 66 |
How does Grievous stay in shape?Spin class. |
| 67 |
What’s the difference between a Stormtrooper and an AT-AT?One is a walking Imperial and the other is an Imperial walker. |
| 68 |
What do Jedi children learn at school?A is for Alderaan, B is for Bantha, C is for Clone Army… |
| 69 |
What do you call Chewbacca when he has chocolate stuck in his hair?Chocolate Chip Wookie. |
| 70 |
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side?Darth Tater. |
| 71 |
What Star Wars character likes orange juice the most?Emperor Pulpatine. |
| 72 |
Why does Star Wars have a classical music score?Because the Empire likes Bach! |
| 73 |
Who stands in a store window modeling the latest Star Wars fashions?Mannequin Skywalker. |
| 74 |
Why is The Legend of Zelda better than Star Wars?It has triple the force. |
| 75 |
Why is Darth Vader not safe for children under age 3?He’s a choking hazard! |
| 76 |
Why aren’t Star Wars jokes for kids popular?They are usually quite forced. |
| 77 |
What do you call an invisible Star Wars droid?C-thru-PO. |
| 78 |
What do you call a Star Wars droid that takes the long way around?R2 Detour. |
| 79 |
What do Imperial pilots eat?TIE food. |
| 80 |
What’s a train’s favorite Star Wars character?Choochoobacca. |
| 81 |
What’s the most popular Star Wars action figure in Japan?Toy-Yoda. |
| 82 |
Where do Sith lords shop?At the Darth Mall. |
| 83 |
How do Ewoks communicate over long distances?With Ewokie Talkies. |
| 84 |
Which Star Wars character would make the best pirate?Arrrrrrr2D2. |
| 85 |
Triangles don’t exist in the Star Wars universe…Only do-angles and donot-angles. |
| 86 |
Which Star Wars character would you never lend money to?Owe-Me-One Kenobi. |
| 87 |
We live in a world where there are 7 Star Wars movies that have opening crawl.Then there is a Rogue One. |
| 88 |
How to trigger a Star Wars fan on May 4th?Go Fourth and Prosper. |
| 89 |
What do you call it when one Star Wars character gives you a round of applause?A hand solo. |
| 90 |
Do you know why the robots in Star Wars hate glass?Cause An droid can’t have Windows. |
| 91 |
When did the Jedi start to think Anakin was heading towards the dark side?When he was in the Sith Grade. |
| 92 |
Which car is fish Star Wars?Koi-Yoda. |
| 93 |
Where does Jabba eat dinner?Pizza Hutt. |
| 94 |
Who do Jedi call to help open PDF files?Adobe Wan Kenobi. |
| 95 |
Which Star Wars Character is Italian?Obi-Wan Cannoli. |
| 96 |
What do you call someone that tries to be a Jedi?Obi-Wannabe |
| 97 |
How do you know your phone has a full battery in the Star Wars universe?Chargar Blinks. |
| 98 |
Did you know Darth Vader’s cousin lives in Switzerland and drives a cab?He’s called ‘Taxi Vader’. |
| 99 |
What did Darth Vader’s teacher say when he was disrupting her class?“Sith down and be quiet.” |
| 100 |
What did the sweet potato say to Luke Skywalker?“I yam your father.” |
| 101 |
What do you call a Jedi who’s in denial?Obi-Wan Can-not Be. |
| 102 |
What do you call a stressed Darth Vader?Panickin Skywalker. |
| 103 |
How do Jedi sing?By yoda-ling. |
| 104 |
Why shouldn’t you ask Yoda for money?Because he’s always short. |
| 105 |
What do you call a Sith Lord who works at a restaurant?Darth Waiter. |
| 106 |
Why didn’t they let Yoda name the dinosaurs?Because the do-or-do-not-ceratops sounds very stupid. |
| 107 |
Why does Princess Leia keep her hair tied up in buns?So it doesn’t Hang Solow. |
| 108 |
What’s Anakin Skywalker’s least favorite game?“The Floor Is Lava”! |
| 109 |
What is Darth Vader’s favorite month?Imperial March. |
| 110 |
What do you call a hump-backed Jedi Knight?Mark Camel. |
| 111 |
How many Skywalkers does it take to change a lightbulb?Just one, but you’ll have to give him a hand. |
| 112 |
Why was Darth Vader arrested?Excessive use of force. |
| 113 |
Why does Emperor Palpatine shoot electricity out of his hands?Because he’s in charge. |
| 114 |
What does Darth Vader order at Indian restaurants?Lots of naan, naan, naan, naan naan naan, naan naan naan. |